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Christmas

Dirty Santa

In previous posts, I have talked about Christmas gifts at work. “Dirty Santa” gift swaps became a staple of the department Christmas parties we had several years back. For those of you unfamiliar with how these swaps work, the rules are simple. Each person brings a wrapped gift. There is usually a targeted dollar amount for the gifts. Slips of numbered paper are drawn by each person. The person with number 1 choses one of the gifts. The person with number 2 can either select a new gift or steal the gift from the first person selected. When both people have a gift, the next person takes a turn until everyone has a gift.  There are usually rules about how many times a gift can be stolen before it’s taken out of circulation. And you usually cannot take back a gift that was just taken from you.

​Some people would bring practical gifts like towels or tools. Things to decorate the house were also popular. Gag gifts of a sexual nature became popular over the years. My wife and I would often bring alcohol gifts. At the same time, we would try and find something interesting or different at the liquor store.  One year, we found some novelty shots with interesting names. When these were opened at the party and were quickly stolen several times. Our other gift that year was a bottle of wine. The wine was named “Bitch”. While most of the people at the party were drinkers, few of them drank wine. The person who selected it as a gift, was not a drinker. To make matters worse, her husband was a pastor. He was not at the party but we had met him before. So everyone knew that he was the type of pastor that wouldn’t welcome a bottle of wine in his house much less a product with the word “bitch” on the label. Everyone got a big kid out of the fact that she got the gift. And no one was going to steal it from her. Her adult son was at the party with her and ended up taking the bottle home. 

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